DISASTER DAY

Two days ago, Friday evening, Blue Butterfly received a short message from her mentor after she just finished teaching. Receiving those messages was actually the starting of her Disaster Day because those messages informed Blue Butterfly that She had failed her BA Final Recital (5 of the other friends also failed). At first, Blue Butterfly kept repeating reading the messages as if she was reading the wrong sentences or those message was sent to the wrong person. Finally, she replied to the sender and unfortunately, It is true. Suddenly Blue Butterfly felt her heart hurt so much and she could hardly breathe. She could not believe the fact that she had failed the exam as she felt that she was playing smoothly during the recital (although it was not a perfect performance and interpretation), and even some of her friends said that she was doing OK. With much of pain and confusion inside her heart, Blue Butterfly kept walking alone to the MRT station and called her special one, E.E. Butterfly. After hearing the news, E.E. Butterfly immidiately met Blue Butterfly at the nearest MRT station and accompanied her until she was calm. Blue Butterfly then told the exact story to E.E. Butterfly and started to cry and cry and cry....

Blue Butterfly felt deeply sad and hurt because this was her last year in completing her BA and she had failed. Other than that, Blue Butterfly felt that she had already worked so hard regardless her limitation of musicality and technique to pass the exam with no any memory laps or major mistakes. A few days before, her mentor once told her that she will absolutely pass the exam. It's just the mentor could not guarantee which grade (A,B,C,D) Blue Butterfly could achieve. Blue Butterfly already felt satisfied with the "PASS" word and felt relieved. But at the end, She failed the exam and the most sad part was that Blue Butterfly won't be able to join the Graduation Ceremony on August with all of her friends. Although she had re-assessed the exam, she must wait until next year for the graduation ceremony. Blue Butterfly was not able to find the exact reason of her failure.

Blue Butterfly cried the whole 24 hours with no sleep at all by questioning to herself and even to God. Blue Butterfly questioned herself why she was a so untalented and so bad pianist until she could not pass the exam. Then, Blue Butterfly also questioned God why He make this disaster day happened to her while she put all of her trust to Him and always pray to Him everyday. This is the first time in her life that Blue Butterfly dares to questioned God " Why are you leaving me God? Why do you give such hard time, while my other friends who are not a believer like me can always have a very smooth life? What do you want to teach me God and please show me Your Way? "......Blue Butterfly did not sleep and eat and drink for that 24 hours.