a Wonderful Gift from my E.E. Butterfly...thank you so much for the love and care....
Thursday, September 24, 2009
MY BIRTHDAY GIFT - 2
a Wonderful Gift from my E.E. Butterfly...thank you so much for the love and care....
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Fever comes again
Huuufff....Fever comes again to my Body...I hate you Fever...Go awayyyyy.........
Huffff.....My Body is Aching.....Go away from my body.....
Huffff.....My Body is Aching.....Go away from my body.....
I Love my Mother Mary
Thank you Mother Mary for listening to all of my feeling and stories today at Church. It is only You who wants to hear me and give me Your advices. I will always try my best to lighten up my life and go through all of the problems. Just hold me tight to Your hands, My Mother Mary.....Love You...Muaccchhhh
SSssssTTtttt.....
Blue Butterfly is enjoying the quietness and silence in her home.......huh.....so many things that Blue Butterfly keeps inside her heart and really wish that someone will fully understand. Maybe it's only My Father in Heaven will fully understand my feeling. I want to love you more and more, My Lord. Because it is only You who will always love me and never let me go no matter what is happening.
It is painful when someone is letting you go. Maybe it's just a "Karma" for what I had done 2 years ago. Have mercy on me, My Lord. I accept the punishment. Grant me peace and love in my life.
It is painful when someone is letting you go. Maybe it's just a "Karma" for what I had done 2 years ago. Have mercy on me, My Lord. I accept the punishment. Grant me peace and love in my life.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
SILENCE
Suddenly I feel so sad and lonely.......what is happening with my life??? I want my life back....give me back my life.....
one said " If you can't forget your past, then buried it inside your heart and make it become parts of the vitamin that flows inside your body and let it become a memory".
one said " If you can't forget your past, then buried it inside your heart and make it become parts of the vitamin that flows inside your body and let it become a memory".
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
FEVER......GO AWAY....
Blue Butterfly suffered the up and down fever complex for two days. The whole body is aching, especially when it is time to bed and get up from bed. Suddenly in this moment, Blue Butterfly really feels extremely tired for being independent. But, whom can I go to rest myself???
No one.....so only My Father in Heaven.
Go away Fever.....So i can work more and more and forget everything....
No one.....so only My Father in Heaven.
Go away Fever.....So i can work more and more and forget everything....
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
MOTHER VS DAUGHTER
Blue Butterfly is thinking : Is it normal to have different vision and opinions with your own mother??
Blue Butterfly always has the same vision of life and behavior with her mom, but not until now when she is growing up and having her own vision of life which give her happiness and peacefulness. Unfortunately, as a mother, they sometimes are not able to accept those differences and changes in their own daughter's life. The reason is because they love their children so so much and they want to give the best that they can. But what is the best for our mother, is it also the best for ourself?? But when Blue Butterfly tries to explain this circumstances, her mom always said that what she is thinking and doing are all wrong things.
Blue Butterfly was reflecting herself recently and she feels that why those things that her mom thinks are wrong , are actually giving her happiness in life???
Blue Butterfly trully understands her mom's feeling and tries her best to make her happy, but at the end it is God's and her own decision to choose which way she wants to go. Hopefully one day her mom can accept and bless her daughter's decision.
" I just need some space, mom to pursue my own life and destiny, although it might caused something bad to me. Because I believe God will never ever leave me behind. Just see me as a growing up daughter and try to give me some freedom to do what I believe is a good things. But there will be only one important thing that you will always be the best mother I have ever had, no matter what decision I am taking".
LOVE = GIVE + GIVE
LOVE = GIVE + GIVE is a quote from the friend of Blue Butterfly. She is totally agree with this statement, which God also teaches us to live this way.
Does it mean that Blue Butterfly must give up to what she believes as her destiny of happiness???
It is true that Love must have 2 people who want to work it out together. While the other part is letting go, then should I really let go now, O Lord??? Is it actually what you want me to do??? Should I give up now???
Does it mean that Blue Butterfly must give up to what she believes as her destiny of happiness???
It is true that Love must have 2 people who want to work it out together. While the other part is letting go, then should I really let go now, O Lord??? Is it actually what you want me to do??? Should I give up now???
Thursday, August 6, 2009
GOD'S RESPONSE THROUGH MY LOVING MOTHER MARY
" God's response always related to the fruit of the Holy Spirit - Joy, Peace, Love, Patience and Charity. It never leads us to the unnecessary things. But. sometimes we need purification in order to get and feel better things. God said that not to build a house on the sandy ground. He also said when we hold on to a plough, do not look back but plough it through. Just trust Him. God will send us back together if we are meant to be ".
This is what Blue Butterfly received after her rosary to our loving mother Mary and mother of Fatimah in Novena Church.
Give more of your answers to my prayer , O Lord
This is what Blue Butterfly received after her rosary to our loving mother Mary and mother of Fatimah in Novena Church.
Give more of your answers to my prayer , O Lord
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
MISS MY LIFE IN THE PAST
Someone in the movie said :
" I miss my life in the past when I could have the people that I love with me. I miss my personality in the past when I always talked and told stories non stop with my loved one, I laughed and shout loudly when I was happy and was baking cake with my friends, and I always being bubbly and had spirit to do all my works. But that life and personality do not bring me into better life right now. That people is leaving me, together with my life, my personality and my dreams.
But I can't be selfish because loving someone means that we sacrifice anything just to see your loved one happy. I am not able to communicate as a friend. Therefore, I will leave your life completely for a few years until I can accept. I just remember I never say SORRY for all the trouble and the pain that I had caused to you and family, and made you feel doubtful. I must see you live with a fruitful and happy life when I see you again in the next few years,so that I will feel grateful with what I have sacrificed. Take care of yourself. Don't sleep too late and no need to be so ambitious to do so many things. Love and take care your family well. Be a good people to serve God always.Be a successful business man. Thank you for everything....."
" I miss my life in the past when I could have the people that I love with me. I miss my personality in the past when I always talked and told stories non stop with my loved one, I laughed and shout loudly when I was happy and was baking cake with my friends, and I always being bubbly and had spirit to do all my works. But that life and personality do not bring me into better life right now. That people is leaving me, together with my life, my personality and my dreams.
But I can't be selfish because loving someone means that we sacrifice anything just to see your loved one happy. I am not able to communicate as a friend. Therefore, I will leave your life completely for a few years until I can accept. I just remember I never say SORRY for all the trouble and the pain that I had caused to you and family, and made you feel doubtful. I must see you live with a fruitful and happy life when I see you again in the next few years,so that I will feel grateful with what I have sacrificed. Take care of yourself. Don't sleep too late and no need to be so ambitious to do so many things. Love and take care your family well. Be a good people to serve God always.Be a successful business man. Thank you for everything....."
Monday, August 3, 2009
RECOVER
Blue Butterfly just recovers herself after suddenly having fever in the middle of last night. Fortunately, no more fever this morning, so that Blue Butterfly still can go to work. WORK....WORK...AND WORK HARD...AND PRACTICE HARD....EVERYDAY...
Sunday, August 2, 2009
GO SOMEWHERE...
Blue Butterfly :
" I can't cope with myself anymore. I need to go somewhere to clear my mind. Maybe go other country to visit my friends will make me feel better
or go to visit a beach will clear my mind ".
" I can't cope with myself anymore. I need to go somewhere to clear my mind. Maybe go other country to visit my friends will make me feel better
or go to visit a beach will clear my mind ".
Friday, July 31, 2009
My LIFE TODAY...
It's a no working day for Blue Butterfly today. After done with her cooking and house cleaning, Blue Butterfly decided to go to Novena Church to pray and pour out her sadness. Church is the only place where Blue Butterfly can go to calm herself and to cope with her pain.
After 1 hour of praying, Blue Butterfly decided to walk to the Novena Square. In the middle of the walk, Blue Butterfly was suddenly shocked by the honking of a car. When Blue Butterfly saw to the right, it was a car which nearly bumped into her. It's not the driver's fault because Blue Butterfly kept walking straight until she ignored the traffic light.
Suddenly Blue Butterfly's heart pumping very fast until she could not breathe. There was a thought in her mind for a second that it will be good if the car bumped into her, so that she can faint, then wake up with memory loss. It will be the fastest way to let go all of her pain.
Fortunately, God wakes Blue Butterfly up that She thanks God million times for saving her from the car accident. In fact, this is the second time God saves her from car accident. The first time was about 2-3 months ago.
After that, Blue Butterfly canceled to go to the Novena Square and straightly going back home with pumping heart.....Why Blue Butterfly's life is full with disaster recently??? But God teach His people to be patient and surrender to Him....
After 1 hour of praying, Blue Butterfly decided to walk to the Novena Square. In the middle of the walk, Blue Butterfly was suddenly shocked by the honking of a car. When Blue Butterfly saw to the right, it was a car which nearly bumped into her. It's not the driver's fault because Blue Butterfly kept walking straight until she ignored the traffic light.
Suddenly Blue Butterfly's heart pumping very fast until she could not breathe. There was a thought in her mind for a second that it will be good if the car bumped into her, so that she can faint, then wake up with memory loss. It will be the fastest way to let go all of her pain.
Fortunately, God wakes Blue Butterfly up that She thanks God million times for saving her from the car accident. In fact, this is the second time God saves her from car accident. The first time was about 2-3 months ago.
After that, Blue Butterfly canceled to go to the Novena Square and straightly going back home with pumping heart.....Why Blue Butterfly's life is full with disaster recently??? But God teach His people to be patient and surrender to Him....
Thursday, July 30, 2009
ACTUAL LOVE
What is love for Blue Butterfly???
Love is the most beautiful thing, yet the most painful thing to experience. Blue Butterfly once told a friend that her dreams is to become a good housewife for her husband and a good mother for her own children. But, just by the time Blue Butterfly feels how great the love she is having, She must face with the reality that she should let go. That's why Love is beautiful, but yet it is painful...
Since today onwards, Blue Butterfly does not want to believe on any relationship, yet marriage because both of them are painful. At the end, something beautiful will leave you. Blue butterfly will give and share her love to those people who need it more. Besides that, Blue Butterfly has her cute and lovely students whom she can regard as her children. Maybe through this sufferings, God wants to teach Blue Butterfly that there are still so many other ways to show our love and to have love.
Love is the most beautiful thing, yet the most painful thing to experience. Blue Butterfly once told a friend that her dreams is to become a good housewife for her husband and a good mother for her own children. But, just by the time Blue Butterfly feels how great the love she is having, She must face with the reality that she should let go. That's why Love is beautiful, but yet it is painful...
Since today onwards, Blue Butterfly does not want to believe on any relationship, yet marriage because both of them are painful. At the end, something beautiful will leave you. Blue butterfly will give and share her love to those people who need it more. Besides that, Blue Butterfly has her cute and lovely students whom she can regard as her children. Maybe through this sufferings, God wants to teach Blue Butterfly that there are still so many other ways to show our love and to have love.
TODAY'S MENU
Today Blue Butterfly entertains herself at home by doing some cooking for her breakfast, lunch and dinner. It is good for Blue Butterfly's diet by doing cooking, as she is not able to eat much of her own cooking. So.....
MENU OF THE DAY:
1. Tender Stewed Beef Soup with Potatoes and Carrots
2. A Big Bowl of Fried Garlic Rice
3. A Big Cup of Healthy Honey Drink
MENU OF THE DAY:
1. Tender Stewed Beef Soup with Potatoes and Carrots
2. A Big Bowl of Fried Garlic Rice
3. A Big Cup of Healthy Honey Drink
FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON
Blue Butterfly's words:
What happen to me??? why the more I pray to God to show me something that can convince me not to choose you, but until today He keeps showing me something to convince me to choose you. Unfortunately, I think it's too late. Just give me your strength to let go, My Lord. Please do not show me anything more. Please don't...
LET GO THE BUTTERFLY
Do you know that Butterfly is actually as the same as human being??? They will find the most beautiful flower to stay and eat the honey from the flower, so that the flower will grow and grow. Butterfly is also a faithful one as they always stick with their couple. That's why they are called Butterfly lovers. But after some period of time, the Butterfly lovers will go their own way to find the other beautiful flowers......
Blue Butterfly learn some life lesson today. In life, we always try to find or buy things that we really love so much. We always try to find places and friends that we are comfortable with. And by the time we find them, we absolutely will hold on them tightly, so that nobody can have them.
Unfortunately it's not always happening in our real life. Sometimes in our life, we must learn to let go things, although they are something that we love so much. Maybe by letting go, we can get better things or those things can be owned by somebody else who deserve them more.
At the end, although you really can not let go, you must pray hard to let go......
So, Blue Butterfly decides to let go her EE Butterfly, so that EE Butterfly can get freedom and can experience better things.......GOODBYE EE Butterfly.....you are free now.....I'm letting you go already.....
Blue Butterfly learn some life lesson today. In life, we always try to find or buy things that we really love so much. We always try to find places and friends that we are comfortable with. And by the time we find them, we absolutely will hold on them tightly, so that nobody can have them.
Unfortunately it's not always happening in our real life. Sometimes in our life, we must learn to let go things, although they are something that we love so much. Maybe by letting go, we can get better things or those things can be owned by somebody else who deserve them more.
At the end, although you really can not let go, you must pray hard to let go......
So, Blue Butterfly decides to let go her EE Butterfly, so that EE Butterfly can get freedom and can experience better things.......GOODBYE EE Butterfly.....you are free now.....I'm letting you go already.....
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
NICE AND ROMANTIC SONG TO SLEEP
Here is Blue Butterfly favourite song to accompany her to sleep at night. Sounds very calm and romantic. Very suitable for candle light dinner. hehehe....
KARAOKE DAY
Today Blue Butterfly starts to refresh and enjoy her life and her emptyness at home by singing karaoke. hehehehe.....can you imagine a butterfly is singing???? it is cute, isn't it??
It's actually not a proper karaoke. Blue Butterfly just plays the song list in her itune, then starts to sing and imitate the original singer's voice. heheheh...it's quite entertaining. So for the other butterflies who feel lonely and scared while you are alone at home, this trick is working.
TRY IT !!!
At the same time, Blue Butterfly sings the karaoke and cook for her lunch and dinner.
MENU OF THE DAY :
1. Shreded Chicken Soup with Cheewey Fish Balls
2. Grilled Sutchi Fish Fillet in Oyster and Dark Soy Sauce
3. One Big Bowl of Fragrance Thailand Rice
4. One Big Cup of Healthy Sweet Honey Drink
5. Healthy Sweet Papaya
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
MENU OF THE DAY
Blue Butterfly was cooking this morning for her lunch and dinner.....
Menu of the day :
1. Pork Ribs Soup with Potatoes and Carrots
2. Fried Garlic Chicken Sausage with Oyster Sauce and Dark Soy Sauce
3. Fried Green Vegetable with Garlic Eggs in Salty Sauce
4. One Bowl of Fragrance Thailand Rice
5. One Big Cup of Healthy Sweet Honey Drink
Menu of the day :
1. Pork Ribs Soup with Potatoes and Carrots
2. Fried Garlic Chicken Sausage with Oyster Sauce and Dark Soy Sauce
3. Fried Green Vegetable with Garlic Eggs in Salty Sauce
4. One Bowl of Fragrance Thailand Rice
5. One Big Cup of Healthy Sweet Honey Drink
MY LIFE FOR NOW
Blue Butterfly recently realise that she decides to live her life by herself for now. She decides to stay closer to God, responsible to her job and do more social work or any activities which serve God. Sometimes God creates His people to stay by herself because He knows it is better for them. So for now, Blue Butterfly wants to accept that offer.
What is the true feeling of pain???
So many things happened in the life of Blue Butterfly recently which taught her a lesson about the true feeling of painfulness. It's not about being failed from exam or has not enough money. It's more than that........
Do you know how painful is it when you have somebody you love so much with all your heart, but at the end you must let go because of some reasons that you yourself actually can not accept?
Do you know how extremely painful is it when someone you love so much and someone whom you still put hope on is actually trying to let you go and trying to stay away from you and trying to ignore you day by day?
Do you know how painful is it when you text someone you love so much, but that people is not keen to reply back and do not care about you as much as it used to be?
Do you know how painful is it when you are trying to explain what actually can make you happy, but those people can not accept your thoughts and say you are actually know nothing?
Do you know how painful is it when you feel lonely, scared in the middle of the night and really need someone to talk, but actually there is no one at home for you to go to, then you must comfort yourself and cope with those burdens by yourself?
Do you know how painful is it when you eat your breakfast, lunch and dinner by yourself?
Do you know how painful is it when you cook so much nice food by yourself, but there is no one to try out your cooking?
Do you know how painful is it when you actually realise that you had not talk to anyone for the whole day?
Do you know how painful is it when you look around in your house and you only can find computer, tv, table and chairs around you?
Do you know how painful is it when you have no place to socialise with?
Do you know how painful is it when you invite your friends to have dinner at your house for your coming birthday, but only few of them can make it?
Do you know how painful is it when you actually typing on your computer and tears just coming out from your eyes?
So for all the butterflies in the world. If none of you have experienced such things in your life, it means that you are very fortunate and do not say that you feel painful. But, although Blue Butterfly had experienced those unfortunate events in her life, She still wants to believe that God is still with her and she must pray, sacrifice and be patient.
Do you know how painful is it when you have somebody you love so much with all your heart, but at the end you must let go because of some reasons that you yourself actually can not accept?
Do you know how extremely painful is it when someone you love so much and someone whom you still put hope on is actually trying to let you go and trying to stay away from you and trying to ignore you day by day?
Do you know how painful is it when you text someone you love so much, but that people is not keen to reply back and do not care about you as much as it used to be?
Do you know how painful is it when you are trying to explain what actually can make you happy, but those people can not accept your thoughts and say you are actually know nothing?
Do you know how painful is it when you feel lonely, scared in the middle of the night and really need someone to talk, but actually there is no one at home for you to go to, then you must comfort yourself and cope with those burdens by yourself?
Do you know how painful is it when you eat your breakfast, lunch and dinner by yourself?
Do you know how painful is it when you cook so much nice food by yourself, but there is no one to try out your cooking?
Do you know how painful is it when you actually realise that you had not talk to anyone for the whole day?
Do you know how painful is it when you look around in your house and you only can find computer, tv, table and chairs around you?
Do you know how painful is it when you have no place to socialise with?
Do you know how painful is it when you invite your friends to have dinner at your house for your coming birthday, but only few of them can make it?
Do you know how painful is it when you actually typing on your computer and tears just coming out from your eyes?
So for all the butterflies in the world. If none of you have experienced such things in your life, it means that you are very fortunate and do not say that you feel painful. But, although Blue Butterfly had experienced those unfortunate events in her life, She still wants to believe that God is still with her and she must pray, sacrifice and be patient.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I HATE MYSELF AND MY LIFE
Blue Butterfly said...
" I just hate myself and my life so much because I am not happy with what I have done and what I have gone through. So...I just hate my life and my self. I make so many people dissapointed, I make so many people angry with me, I make so many people cry and feel painful, I make so many people worried and I make myself feeling unhappy. I am a bad person....really a bad person. So all of you just becareful. Stay away from me ".
" I just hate myself and my life so much because I am not happy with what I have done and what I have gone through. So...I just hate my life and my self. I make so many people dissapointed, I make so many people angry with me, I make so many people cry and feel painful, I make so many people worried and I make myself feeling unhappy. I am a bad person....really a bad person. So all of you just becareful. Stay away from me ".
Monday, June 1, 2009
MY FIRST SONG COMPOSITION
The following is Blue Butterfly's first song composition which she submitted for the Competition of Indonesian Idol Final Song Composition in 2007. But unfortunately, Blue Butterfly failed because the recording was not posted and delivered on time to Jakarta office. Too Bad. But it's just a small thing. So...this song was sung by Blue Butterfly's friend, Soprano Butterfly (Elita).
Sunday, May 31, 2009
TODAY'S PRAYER
Blue Butterfly prays :
" O Lord, Mighty Lord. Have mercy on me for questioning Your love to me. You gave me such great pain to pull me closer to You and to feel Your presence in my life. I believe in You, O Lord. Everything is good according to your plan.
You are my savior, my giver of life. You takes away my sadness and You grants me happiness. Do not abandon me, Lord. I surrender my life and my heart to You, and let me walk together with You always. ALLELUIA...AMEN... ".
Inside her heart, Blue Butterfly really wishes that someday God will give her Holy Spirit to make this prayer becomes a Hymn, so that His people are able to Praise and Worship Him more and more.
N.B.
anyone wants to share his/her prayer??? So that, Blue Butterfly can helps to compose more Song for God. Arigato.
Monday, May 25, 2009
WISHING THANKS TO THE LOVELY ONES
Through this opportunity, Blue Butterfly wants to say "Thank You" to whom who helped her in going through her pain.
To my Great Family...
" Thank you for your million calls and sms in giving me advices and courage to be strong and brave in facing my pain. Thank you for my parents who told me about my weaknesses and helped me to find the way out. Thank you my brothers who immediately text me to stay calm and told me that God is planning to make me become a better person in life ".
To my Special One, E.E. Butterfly...
" Thank you for being there always for me from the start until the end. Thank you for all of your prayer. Thank you for the sadness that you felt for me. Thank you for accompanying me for the whole day just to make me laugh again, although I know you suffered lots of leg pain and felt extremely tired. Thank you for your Japanese Robot dance which really made me burst into laugh. Thank you for treating me a good and expensive lunch. You are precious for me. I already have my spirit back ".
To my friends and teachers...
" Thank you so much for all your kindness and attention and support and pray. By actually knowing that I still have you all who trust me is a courage to stand firm and face my pain ".
To Pink Butterfly....
" Thank you for your silent pray for me in your blog and thank you for your support. Thank you for the love that makes me feel the love of God ".
To the Youth Community of the St. Mary Church...
" Thank you for your sincerity to pray for me and to share your life experience with me. Thank you for welcoming me into your community. Thank you to be the people of God who helped me take away my sadness, anger and pain ".
To my Great Family...
" Thank you for your million calls and sms in giving me advices and courage to be strong and brave in facing my pain. Thank you for my parents who told me about my weaknesses and helped me to find the way out. Thank you my brothers who immediately text me to stay calm and told me that God is planning to make me become a better person in life ".
To my Special One, E.E. Butterfly...
" Thank you for being there always for me from the start until the end. Thank you for all of your prayer. Thank you for the sadness that you felt for me. Thank you for accompanying me for the whole day just to make me laugh again, although I know you suffered lots of leg pain and felt extremely tired. Thank you for your Japanese Robot dance which really made me burst into laugh. Thank you for treating me a good and expensive lunch. You are precious for me. I already have my spirit back ".
To my friends and teachers...
" Thank you so much for all your kindness and attention and support and pray. By actually knowing that I still have you all who trust me is a courage to stand firm and face my pain ".
To Pink Butterfly....
" Thank you for your silent pray for me in your blog and thank you for your support. Thank you for the love that makes me feel the love of God ".
To the Youth Community of the St. Mary Church...
" Thank you for your sincerity to pray for me and to share your life experience with me. Thank you for welcoming me into your community. Thank you to be the people of God who helped me take away my sadness, anger and pain ".
Sunday, May 24, 2009
BAPTISM OF THE HOLY SPIRIT
Baptism of The Holy Spirit is the answer of all the questions that Blue Butterfly had ever asked to God during her DISASTER DAY.
The day after her Disaster Day, Blue Butterfly was having lunch with her special E.E. Butterfly at the nearby shopping centre. E.E. Butterfly kept convinced Blue Butterfly that he heard God said He wanted to teach Blue Butterfly something through this pain that she was suffering. After lots of sharing and talking, Blue Butterfly suddenly said to E.E.Butterfly that God wants her to see the life in the real world and wants her to become a good teacher in the future. But she wasn't sure about that yet. Then, E.E. Butterfly asked her to join him to the church that afternoon to let go all of the pain. At the same time, E.E. Butterfly was going to give a talk about Baptism of The Holy Spirit on that day among the church youth community. So, Blue Butterfly followed to the church. During the trip to the church, E.E. Butterfly kept explaining about Baptism of Holy Spirit and what they were going to do later on. Then, Blue Butterfly said to E.E. Butterfly that she will just sit down there and watch. But, E.E. Butterfly answered wisely that it was actually not a show to watch, but it was a miracle to feel. So, E.E. Butterfly said that maybe later Blue Butterfly will feel the Holy Spirit from God and will change her mind. Blue Butterfly nodded quietly with all of the pain in her heart.
Finally, we arrived in the church at 3pm. Blue Butterfly was introduced to some new friends who are very friendly and warmly welcomed her coming. Then, the Pray and Worship started. Only by the first prayer and hymns by the community leader, the tears had filled and run down over the face of Blue Butterfly. Blue Butterfly cried because she felt so sad and tired from the pain that she was suffering and she urged to see that God will show His way and help her to go through all of this pain. Blue Butterfly kept crying in every prayer and worship until it had finished. After the prayer and worship, E.E. Butterfly shared his life experience in regaining his Faith to God and how he finally felt the work of the Holy Spirit by taking him closer and closer to God, although he has no logic reason about the presence of God. The talk by E.E. Butterfly gave some idea to Blue Butterfly about the Baptism of Holy Spirit.
After the Praise and Worship session, everybody was divided into 5-6 people in a group with two group leaders each. The purpose of this group division is for us to have time to share with each other about our experience with God or any other questions that we are uncertain about. Blue Butterfly was not a person who was willing to share her personal life to unfamiliar people. But after hearing other people experiences, Blue Butterfly suddenly hear the sound which opened her heart and mind about all the pain that she was suffering and how God deeply loves her. After that, Blue Butterfly urged to open her mouth and share all of her pain in tears....
" I am suffering a deep pain and failure right now which I know those pain happened because of injustice things in my environment. I keep asking God why He gives me such painful moment meanwhile I always believe and pray to Him. Then, I flash back to my previous believes on Him since young. I realise something that I was baptised, believe in God and go to church everyday are because my Mother and my teachers taught me to do so. And I always said that God is very kind because during this time I always experienced the good things that happened in my life. But I actually did not feel and understand the actual meaning of God's love and presence in my life. I don't even know why I must go to church. To get good things??? The answer is "NO". God gives me such deep pain, so that I can be better and stronger person who always depend and closer to Him. God actually loves me so much that in this disaster situation, He never leaves me alone. He surrounds me with the love and courage from my family, my boyfriend, my teachers and my friends. He even brings me to this youth community to find all of the answers. God shows me that life is actually very painful, therefore we must always believe and walk together with Him. God knows that I have the passion to become a teacher, and therefore He teaches me how to become a good teacher in the future. Now I really feel the love and presence of God in my life and I believe this is what Baptism of The Holy Spirit means to me ".
The last session of this whole retreat is the Praying Over session, whereby everybody in each group was prayed by their group leaders. Blue Butterfly kept crying to God and she felt more relieve from her pain after that.
The day after her Disaster Day, Blue Butterfly was having lunch with her special E.E. Butterfly at the nearby shopping centre. E.E. Butterfly kept convinced Blue Butterfly that he heard God said He wanted to teach Blue Butterfly something through this pain that she was suffering. After lots of sharing and talking, Blue Butterfly suddenly said to E.E.Butterfly that God wants her to see the life in the real world and wants her to become a good teacher in the future. But she wasn't sure about that yet. Then, E.E. Butterfly asked her to join him to the church that afternoon to let go all of the pain. At the same time, E.E. Butterfly was going to give a talk about Baptism of The Holy Spirit on that day among the church youth community. So, Blue Butterfly followed to the church. During the trip to the church, E.E. Butterfly kept explaining about Baptism of Holy Spirit and what they were going to do later on. Then, Blue Butterfly said to E.E. Butterfly that she will just sit down there and watch. But, E.E. Butterfly answered wisely that it was actually not a show to watch, but it was a miracle to feel. So, E.E. Butterfly said that maybe later Blue Butterfly will feel the Holy Spirit from God and will change her mind. Blue Butterfly nodded quietly with all of the pain in her heart.
Finally, we arrived in the church at 3pm. Blue Butterfly was introduced to some new friends who are very friendly and warmly welcomed her coming. Then, the Pray and Worship started. Only by the first prayer and hymns by the community leader, the tears had filled and run down over the face of Blue Butterfly. Blue Butterfly cried because she felt so sad and tired from the pain that she was suffering and she urged to see that God will show His way and help her to go through all of this pain. Blue Butterfly kept crying in every prayer and worship until it had finished. After the prayer and worship, E.E. Butterfly shared his life experience in regaining his Faith to God and how he finally felt the work of the Holy Spirit by taking him closer and closer to God, although he has no logic reason about the presence of God. The talk by E.E. Butterfly gave some idea to Blue Butterfly about the Baptism of Holy Spirit.
After the Praise and Worship session, everybody was divided into 5-6 people in a group with two group leaders each. The purpose of this group division is for us to have time to share with each other about our experience with God or any other questions that we are uncertain about. Blue Butterfly was not a person who was willing to share her personal life to unfamiliar people. But after hearing other people experiences, Blue Butterfly suddenly hear the sound which opened her heart and mind about all the pain that she was suffering and how God deeply loves her. After that, Blue Butterfly urged to open her mouth and share all of her pain in tears....
" I am suffering a deep pain and failure right now which I know those pain happened because of injustice things in my environment. I keep asking God why He gives me such painful moment meanwhile I always believe and pray to Him. Then, I flash back to my previous believes on Him since young. I realise something that I was baptised, believe in God and go to church everyday are because my Mother and my teachers taught me to do so. And I always said that God is very kind because during this time I always experienced the good things that happened in my life. But I actually did not feel and understand the actual meaning of God's love and presence in my life. I don't even know why I must go to church. To get good things??? The answer is "NO". God gives me such deep pain, so that I can be better and stronger person who always depend and closer to Him. God actually loves me so much that in this disaster situation, He never leaves me alone. He surrounds me with the love and courage from my family, my boyfriend, my teachers and my friends. He even brings me to this youth community to find all of the answers. God shows me that life is actually very painful, therefore we must always believe and walk together with Him. God knows that I have the passion to become a teacher, and therefore He teaches me how to become a good teacher in the future. Now I really feel the love and presence of God in my life and I believe this is what Baptism of The Holy Spirit means to me ".
The last session of this whole retreat is the Praying Over session, whereby everybody in each group was prayed by their group leaders. Blue Butterfly kept crying to God and she felt more relieve from her pain after that.
DISASTER DAY
Two days ago, Friday evening, Blue Butterfly received a short message from her mentor after she just finished teaching. Receiving those messages was actually the starting of her Disaster Day because those messages informed Blue Butterfly that She had failed her BA Final Recital (5 of the other friends also failed). At first, Blue Butterfly kept repeating reading the messages as if she was reading the wrong sentences or those message was sent to the wrong person. Finally, she replied to the sender and unfortunately, It is true. Suddenly Blue Butterfly felt her heart hurt so much and she could hardly breathe. She could not believe the fact that she had failed the exam as she felt that she was playing smoothly during the recital (although it was not a perfect performance and interpretation), and even some of her friends said that she was doing OK. With much of pain and confusion inside her heart, Blue Butterfly kept walking alone to the MRT station and called her special one, E.E. Butterfly. After hearing the news, E.E. Butterfly immidiately met Blue Butterfly at the nearest MRT station and accompanied her until she was calm. Blue Butterfly then told the exact story to E.E. Butterfly and started to cry and cry and cry....
Blue Butterfly felt deeply sad and hurt because this was her last year in completing her BA and she had failed. Other than that, Blue Butterfly felt that she had already worked so hard regardless her limitation of musicality and technique to pass the exam with no any memory laps or major mistakes. A few days before, her mentor once told her that she will absolutely pass the exam. It's just the mentor could not guarantee which grade (A,B,C,D) Blue Butterfly could achieve. Blue Butterfly already felt satisfied with the "PASS" word and felt relieved. But at the end, She failed the exam and the most sad part was that Blue Butterfly won't be able to join the Graduation Ceremony on August with all of her friends. Although she had re-assessed the exam, she must wait until next year for the graduation ceremony. Blue Butterfly was not able to find the exact reason of her failure.
Blue Butterfly cried the whole 24 hours with no sleep at all by questioning to herself and even to God. Blue Butterfly questioned herself why she was a so untalented and so bad pianist until she could not pass the exam. Then, Blue Butterfly also questioned God why He make this disaster day happened to her while she put all of her trust to Him and always pray to Him everyday. This is the first time in her life that Blue Butterfly dares to questioned God " Why are you leaving me God? Why do you give such hard time, while my other friends who are not a believer like me can always have a very smooth life? What do you want to teach me God and please show me Your Way? "......Blue Butterfly did not sleep and eat and drink for that 24 hours.
Blue Butterfly felt deeply sad and hurt because this was her last year in completing her BA and she had failed. Other than that, Blue Butterfly felt that she had already worked so hard regardless her limitation of musicality and technique to pass the exam with no any memory laps or major mistakes. A few days before, her mentor once told her that she will absolutely pass the exam. It's just the mentor could not guarantee which grade (A,B,C,D) Blue Butterfly could achieve. Blue Butterfly already felt satisfied with the "PASS" word and felt relieved. But at the end, She failed the exam and the most sad part was that Blue Butterfly won't be able to join the Graduation Ceremony on August with all of her friends. Although she had re-assessed the exam, she must wait until next year for the graduation ceremony. Blue Butterfly was not able to find the exact reason of her failure.
Blue Butterfly cried the whole 24 hours with no sleep at all by questioning to herself and even to God. Blue Butterfly questioned herself why she was a so untalented and so bad pianist until she could not pass the exam. Then, Blue Butterfly also questioned God why He make this disaster day happened to her while she put all of her trust to Him and always pray to Him everyday. This is the first time in her life that Blue Butterfly dares to questioned God " Why are you leaving me God? Why do you give such hard time, while my other friends who are not a believer like me can always have a very smooth life? What do you want to teach me God and please show me Your Way? "......Blue Butterfly did not sleep and eat and drink for that 24 hours.
Monday, May 18, 2009
FINAL RECITAL DAY
Two days ago, precisely on Friday (15 May 09) was an emotional day for Blue Butterfly. That day was her Final Recital day for BA (music). The following stories are how she begins her day....
Blue Butterfly woke up at 9.30 in the morning after having a difficult sleep the night before. It was not as the same as the usual morning, this time Blue Butterfly felt like there were million tons of rocks covering her face until she could hardly breath. But, Blue Butterfly kept praying to God and kept telling herself that everything's going to be alright. Then, Blue Butterfly received a lot of prayer and encouraging words from her family, loved ones and friends.
As the time of her recital was getting nearer and nearer, Blue Butterfly even felt more and more anxious and nervous. But with the Bless and Holy Spirit from God, Blue Butterfly finally finished her recital smoothly with lots of heart and joy, although it was not a perfect performance.
The feeling of playing on the stage with all eyes of audiences watching at you and examiners judging on you is a really truly scary moment. You have practiced for 6 months only for that 45 minutes recital which concludes whether you are doing good or bad. On one side you must be able to control your playing and concentration, while on the other side you must be able to control and psycho your nervousness and consciousness. But, this whole scary moment of Blue Butterfly had made her became more independent and confident person. At the end....Only if you keep believe on God and always put all your hopes and worries on Him, you will be just alright.
" Million Thanks to you my God for all of your blessings in helping me went through all the happiness and sadness during this past 4 years of my undergraduate ". ( Blue Butterfly )
" Special Thanks to my Faithful Friend ( Green Butterfly ) for your support and accompany during my recital and also for giving me a big hug to cry after my recital ". ( Blue Butterfly )
Blue Butterfly woke up at 9.30 in the morning after having a difficult sleep the night before. It was not as the same as the usual morning, this time Blue Butterfly felt like there were million tons of rocks covering her face until she could hardly breath. But, Blue Butterfly kept praying to God and kept telling herself that everything's going to be alright. Then, Blue Butterfly received a lot of prayer and encouraging words from her family, loved ones and friends.
As the time of her recital was getting nearer and nearer, Blue Butterfly even felt more and more anxious and nervous. But with the Bless and Holy Spirit from God, Blue Butterfly finally finished her recital smoothly with lots of heart and joy, although it was not a perfect performance.
The feeling of playing on the stage with all eyes of audiences watching at you and examiners judging on you is a really truly scary moment. You have practiced for 6 months only for that 45 minutes recital which concludes whether you are doing good or bad. On one side you must be able to control your playing and concentration, while on the other side you must be able to control and psycho your nervousness and consciousness. But, this whole scary moment of Blue Butterfly had made her became more independent and confident person. At the end....Only if you keep believe on God and always put all your hopes and worries on Him, you will be just alright.
" Million Thanks to you my God for all of your blessings in helping me went through all the happiness and sadness during this past 4 years of my undergraduate ". ( Blue Butterfly )
" Special Thanks to my Faithful Friend ( Green Butterfly ) for your support and accompany during my recital and also for giving me a big hug to cry after my recital ". ( Blue Butterfly )
Sunday, May 10, 2009
COLORFUL CUP CAKES DAY
Blue Butterfly feels that today is a....
HAPPY....WONDERFUL....COLORFUL.....EXCITED....DAY.....ARRRRGGGGHHHHHH....
Today, Blue Butterfly tries to make a chocolate cheese cup cakes with her two Butterfly Friends. They are the lovely Pink Butterfly and Green Butterfly (housemate). No matter how the result is, but the crucial part of today's event is that everybody feels so so happy in working together, laughing together and eating together...hahaahaa....
At the end, the result of our cup cakes is fantastic ( as it is a first try for everybody ).
The three Butterflies start the day by doing the bakery shopping before starting to make the cup cakes. Well, the entire session of the baking is filled by Passion, Laugh and Big Shouts. After about three hours of hard work, finally the cup cakes are ready to be decorated. And....It tastes so GREAT...GREAT...GREAT. The topping cheese is fantastic, and the melting chocolate inside it is YUMMY. Well...only we need to put more topping in order to make it more fluffy.
Green Butterfly is very good in making the cakes, including putting them into the Hot Oven. How about the other two butterflies??? Blue Butterfly and Pink Butterfly are so excited in doing the decoration part. They keeps putting more and more colorful butter, more and more rainbow sprinkles, and more and more lovely colorful ducks and rabbits. Blue Butterfly realises something that she will make cup cakes or cookies for her future children, so that they can do some creativity and art.
Blue Butterfly then thinks to herself that in her future life with her husband and children, she does not really need much more wealth, but she wishes that she can be always happily spending time and doing things together with her lovely and precious ones like today.
" Really great to spend time with you, my lovely Pink Butterfly and Green Butterfly " (Blue Butterfly)
Saturday, May 9, 2009
MEMORIES........
This following story of Blue Butterfly is inspired by her friend's writing whom she called "Pink Butterfly".
It was yesterday night when Blue Butterfly read a story of "Pink Butterfly" about the words from her heart. Just do not know why, Blue Butterfly felt the story of "Pink Butterfly" was so familiar to her. Suddenly, Blue Butterfly was able to recall about it. That story is used to be what Blue Butterfly herself had experienced before.....
Blue Butterfly is almost in the same circumstances with Pink Butterfly. She is the youngest child, as well as the only daughter in her family. Both of her brothers are much much older than her (in the gap of 6 years old). Blue Butterfly used to be helped by her two big brothers and always regarded them as her pioneer in her life. She mostly get what she wished from her father and she hardly shared things with other people. But, what she was very proud of is that she has the love and intention from her two smart brothers which maybe not everyone had. Maybe because Blue Butterfly is the only daughter, her brothers always tried to give attention, protect and help her whenever she faced some problems. Therefore, Blue Butterfly always felt very safe and loving, yet very self centered in her life. What a Spoiled Princess life of Blue Butterfly.
But as time goes and everybody is growing up, Blue Butterfly had to face the fact that her brothers were not totally hers anymore. Hahaha....her two lovely brothers were having a girlfriend (Blue Butterfly was about 19). It was really a very very good news for Blue Butterfly. But just for some reasons, she felt something had missing. She felt those attentions were not as much as they used to be. When she accompanied her brothers for dating with the girlfriends, she thinks quietly " Hey...those hugs, treats and gifts that my brother gives are all used to be mine". A bit of jealousy here. Then, suddenly there was a fear in her heart that one day her two lovely brothers will abandon her and will never help her anymore, and she will be left alone. But it did not mean that Blue Butterfly hated her brothers' girlfriend. It just her own thought and fear of losing.
Fortunately in this situation of Blue Butterfly, God shows His way. There was one day before her birthday when her brother asked about what gift that Blue Butterfly wished to have. So, Blue Butterfly just jokingly answered. Surprisingly on that day, her brother gave her what she really whised to have. It was a complete set of hair styled equipments. Blue Butterfly kept wondering how her brother managed to buy those things (brothers are bad in shopping). It was actually his brother's girlfriend who helped him to find it in everystore. Since that time, Blue Butterfly realised something that she was not missing any attention, but she was actually having more attention. Then, she also realised that her brother never ever abandon her although he alrady had a girlfriend. Her brothers always share their problems, always asked her for lunch, dinner, holiday, and always helping her. And because of this experience, Blue Butterfly learned how to be more independent and willing to share with other people.
Now, Blue Butterfly is feeling happy and grateful to God that her brothers had found someone who always love and care for them, and also thanks to God that she is actually being given two sisters whom she never had in her life. Blue Butterfly believes that Sister and Girlfriend have different meaning and importance in every heart of a brother. Both of them will never ever be replaced with anyone else. And therefore, brothers will never abandon their sisters and family. So, Blue Butterfly is not scared of beling lonely anymore and she wants to cherish every moment with his brothers, friends and she will also find her own future which she already had right now with her Special One (E.E. Butterfly).
E.E. Butterfly is a great boyfriend, yet great brother. He treats Blue Butterfly very very nice, but in the same time he never neglects his family which Blue Butterfly is very happy about. He often tells short stories about his family members and he also always reflects himself to them. Blue Butterfly knows that his family and She are having different place in his heart that can't be replaced by anybody, because Blue Butterfly also will never replaced her family and E.E. Butterlfly in her heart with anybody else in this world. Blue Butterfly knows that everybody will always be together like they used to be, but maybe every of them will have different priorities in life.
" Thanks to you, my E.E. Butterfly & Pink Butterfly for letting me come to your life and thanks for giving me some times to adjust and adapt to it ". ( Blue Butterfly )
It was yesterday night when Blue Butterfly read a story of "Pink Butterfly" about the words from her heart. Just do not know why, Blue Butterfly felt the story of "Pink Butterfly" was so familiar to her. Suddenly, Blue Butterfly was able to recall about it. That story is used to be what Blue Butterfly herself had experienced before.....
Blue Butterfly is almost in the same circumstances with Pink Butterfly. She is the youngest child, as well as the only daughter in her family. Both of her brothers are much much older than her (in the gap of 6 years old). Blue Butterfly used to be helped by her two big brothers and always regarded them as her pioneer in her life. She mostly get what she wished from her father and she hardly shared things with other people. But, what she was very proud of is that she has the love and intention from her two smart brothers which maybe not everyone had. Maybe because Blue Butterfly is the only daughter, her brothers always tried to give attention, protect and help her whenever she faced some problems. Therefore, Blue Butterfly always felt very safe and loving, yet very self centered in her life. What a Spoiled Princess life of Blue Butterfly.
But as time goes and everybody is growing up, Blue Butterfly had to face the fact that her brothers were not totally hers anymore. Hahaha....her two lovely brothers were having a girlfriend (Blue Butterfly was about 19). It was really a very very good news for Blue Butterfly. But just for some reasons, she felt something had missing. She felt those attentions were not as much as they used to be. When she accompanied her brothers for dating with the girlfriends, she thinks quietly " Hey...those hugs, treats and gifts that my brother gives are all used to be mine". A bit of jealousy here. Then, suddenly there was a fear in her heart that one day her two lovely brothers will abandon her and will never help her anymore, and she will be left alone. But it did not mean that Blue Butterfly hated her brothers' girlfriend. It just her own thought and fear of losing.
Fortunately in this situation of Blue Butterfly, God shows His way. There was one day before her birthday when her brother asked about what gift that Blue Butterfly wished to have. So, Blue Butterfly just jokingly answered. Surprisingly on that day, her brother gave her what she really whised to have. It was a complete set of hair styled equipments. Blue Butterfly kept wondering how her brother managed to buy those things (brothers are bad in shopping). It was actually his brother's girlfriend who helped him to find it in everystore. Since that time, Blue Butterfly realised something that she was not missing any attention, but she was actually having more attention. Then, she also realised that her brother never ever abandon her although he alrady had a girlfriend. Her brothers always share their problems, always asked her for lunch, dinner, holiday, and always helping her. And because of this experience, Blue Butterfly learned how to be more independent and willing to share with other people.
Now, Blue Butterfly is feeling happy and grateful to God that her brothers had found someone who always love and care for them, and also thanks to God that she is actually being given two sisters whom she never had in her life. Blue Butterfly believes that Sister and Girlfriend have different meaning and importance in every heart of a brother. Both of them will never ever be replaced with anyone else. And therefore, brothers will never abandon their sisters and family. So, Blue Butterfly is not scared of beling lonely anymore and she wants to cherish every moment with his brothers, friends and she will also find her own future which she already had right now with her Special One (E.E. Butterfly).
E.E. Butterfly is a great boyfriend, yet great brother. He treats Blue Butterfly very very nice, but in the same time he never neglects his family which Blue Butterfly is very happy about. He often tells short stories about his family members and he also always reflects himself to them. Blue Butterfly knows that his family and She are having different place in his heart that can't be replaced by anybody, because Blue Butterfly also will never replaced her family and E.E. Butterlfly in her heart with anybody else in this world. Blue Butterfly knows that everybody will always be together like they used to be, but maybe every of them will have different priorities in life.
" Thanks to you, my E.E. Butterfly & Pink Butterfly for letting me come to your life and thanks for giving me some times to adjust and adapt to it ". ( Blue Butterfly )
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
WHAT A WONDERFUL DAY
Blue Butterfly is so so Happy today. She watches a great movie, X-Men The Original Wolverine, after practicing piano for the whole day. But, what makes the day so so Wonderful is that she is accompanied by two lovely Butterflies, her Special One ( E.E. Butterfly ) and his sister ( Pink Butterfly ).
" Thanks to you my lovely ones for the accompaniment. Have a good night and rest. God Bless You ".
(Blue Butterfly)
" Thanks to you my lovely ones for the accompaniment. Have a good night and rest. God Bless You ".
(Blue Butterfly)
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Satisfaction as a Teacher
STUDENT RECORD #1
That day was the day when Blue Butterfly certainly understood about the satisfaction as an educator. So, Blue Butterfly was having a young student (9 years old) who was preparing for the Piano ABRSM Grade 1 exam. Her name is "Moshi Maru". She had learned piano under Ms. Blue Butterfly for about 1 year, before her parents finally decided to register their daughter for the exam. Honestly, it was a shock for Blue Butterfly as she knows well about the learning progression of "Moshi Maru".
"Moshi Maru" can be considered as a slow learner with good spirit. Also can be considered as a student with poor musical talent. She is weak in sense of rhythm and pulse, sense of body coordination, sense of musical flow, sense of aural skill, as well as sense of notes reading. At first, Blue Butterfly was trying to give up on "Moshi Maru", but suddenly she thought to herself " maybe this student is given by God to me, so that I can help her, not to abandon her ". Since that time, Blue Butterfly knows that her passion and hard work in guiding "Moshi Maru" will benefit her in the future. So, Blue Butterfly kept finding different ways of teaching in order to make the student understand.
After the hard work for 1 year, the exam day had finally come. It was not only a nervous day for "Moshi Maru", but it was also a nervous day for Blue Butterfly. But, in the middle of that tense moment, "Moshi Maru" suddenly says " Teacher, thank you. I even can't believe myself that I can play all of the exam pieces ". Blue Butterfly almost cried when she heard those sentences. Because of that moment, Blue Butterfly finally feels the genuine satisfaction as a teacher.
The satisfaction as a teacher does not lie on what results or achievements your student had obtained, but it lies on how much he/she had improved and feels motivated. Through this experience, Blue Butterfly believes that Passion, Encouragement and Creativity are the main requirements which every teacher should explore more. At the end of the story, "Moshi Maru" was certified with pass in her exam. WONDERFUL DAY...
That day was the day when Blue Butterfly certainly understood about the satisfaction as an educator. So, Blue Butterfly was having a young student (9 years old) who was preparing for the Piano ABRSM Grade 1 exam. Her name is "Moshi Maru". She had learned piano under Ms. Blue Butterfly for about 1 year, before her parents finally decided to register their daughter for the exam. Honestly, it was a shock for Blue Butterfly as she knows well about the learning progression of "Moshi Maru".
"Moshi Maru" can be considered as a slow learner with good spirit. Also can be considered as a student with poor musical talent. She is weak in sense of rhythm and pulse, sense of body coordination, sense of musical flow, sense of aural skill, as well as sense of notes reading. At first, Blue Butterfly was trying to give up on "Moshi Maru", but suddenly she thought to herself " maybe this student is given by God to me, so that I can help her, not to abandon her ". Since that time, Blue Butterfly knows that her passion and hard work in guiding "Moshi Maru" will benefit her in the future. So, Blue Butterfly kept finding different ways of teaching in order to make the student understand.
After the hard work for 1 year, the exam day had finally come. It was not only a nervous day for "Moshi Maru", but it was also a nervous day for Blue Butterfly. But, in the middle of that tense moment, "Moshi Maru" suddenly says " Teacher, thank you. I even can't believe myself that I can play all of the exam pieces ". Blue Butterfly almost cried when she heard those sentences. Because of that moment, Blue Butterfly finally feels the genuine satisfaction as a teacher.
The satisfaction as a teacher does not lie on what results or achievements your student had obtained, but it lies on how much he/she had improved and feels motivated. Through this experience, Blue Butterfly believes that Passion, Encouragement and Creativity are the main requirements which every teacher should explore more. At the end of the story, "Moshi Maru" was certified with pass in her exam. WONDERFUL DAY...
The Day when Blue Butterfly Found her Job
Three years ago....
Blue Butterfly was accepted as a piano teacher in a small little music school after having an audition and interview for an hour (confused with the long rules). Let us name it "A" music school. As the first image, Blue Butterfly found that it was a cozy and comfortable school, with a friendly directors. For the first 3 months, Blue Butterfly enjoyed her work so much and she loved her students. Unfortunately, Blue Butterfly felt something was missing in her work after the 8th month. What is missing??? It used to be a question with no answer for Blue Butterfly. Well...after doing some observations and evaluations, finally she found its answers. It was the Passion and Encouragement, which she could not find in the "A" music school. At the end, Blue Butterfly resigned from her work.
It was a lucky day. By the time Blue Butterfly intended to resign from her work, she got an offer as a piano teacher in other music school as well. The name is "MK" music school. By the time she reached there, she silently said inside her heart " Thanks God, this is just what I wish to have in the future ". It is a music school filled with arts and passion, with wise and friendly directors. At the end, Blue Butterfly feels so Happy Yupi Yupi to work there until nowadays.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Day full of Joy and Peace
Blue Butterfly is sharing story with the other butterflies.....
Yesterday was the day full of Joy and Peace for me. It was not because someone did or gave something to me, but I was so happy because I did give Joy and Peace to other people. They were two different population.
The first population in the afternoon was the elderly ( Grandpa and Grandma Butterfly) between the age of 60-80 years old in the old folks daily activity centre. Actually, My other four friends and I were there in purpose to do our Music Therapy activity presentation. We provided some 70s & 80s Chinese popular song to sing together, such as Ye Lai Xiang and Tien Mi Mi ( hope some of you will recognise them ). The couple of hours before the event, My friends and I were rehearsing the whole programmes of the activity. It was a very tough and tiring rehearsal as all of us were struggling with the guitar and everything seemed so unorganise. Well....actually it was a last minute rehearsal though. We were quite concern that we would do a messy presentation for the elderly. So finally, it was the time of the presentation. It was a very different situation from what we had thought before. The Grandpa and Grandma Butterflies in their 60s to 80s are Very Very Active. They were acting as if they were 40s to 50s. It was just unbelievable to see them. It really gave us the spirit to do our activities. They sang loudly with us, they danced together with us, they clapped and wave the beat of the music, and they laugh together with us. When we were asking how did they feel, they always answer " We are so Happy ". Suddenly it was that time when I felt extremely satisfy and happy with myself that I already serve other people with Joy and Peace.
Oh Blue Butterfly can't stop sharing story now, but the other butterflies keep listening....
The second population was My Special Butterfly who was celebrating his 23rd B'day. We were having delicious dinner with the other friends ( 10 Butterflies ). Special Butterfly was surprised by the beautiful B'day cake in the beginning, then he shared the cakes with everybody. Everybody was so busy of taking picture smiling here and there. After that, the second surprise for Special Butterfly was the gift from his sister ( Pink Butterfly ) and I. The last surprise was the Hand-made B'day card by Pink Butterfly with all of our signatures and whishes inside. I just feel so delightful to see Special Butterfly felt so happy and was so touched with all of the surprises and to see all of his friends who care and love him so much.
Finally I understand what My God always say " It is better for you to serve than to be served ".
Yesterday was the day full of Joy and Peace for me. It was not because someone did or gave something to me, but I was so happy because I did give Joy and Peace to other people. They were two different population.
The first population in the afternoon was the elderly ( Grandpa and Grandma Butterfly) between the age of 60-80 years old in the old folks daily activity centre. Actually, My other four friends and I were there in purpose to do our Music Therapy activity presentation. We provided some 70s & 80s Chinese popular song to sing together, such as Ye Lai Xiang and Tien Mi Mi ( hope some of you will recognise them ). The couple of hours before the event, My friends and I were rehearsing the whole programmes of the activity. It was a very tough and tiring rehearsal as all of us were struggling with the guitar and everything seemed so unorganise. Well....actually it was a last minute rehearsal though. We were quite concern that we would do a messy presentation for the elderly. So finally, it was the time of the presentation. It was a very different situation from what we had thought before. The Grandpa and Grandma Butterflies in their 60s to 80s are Very Very Active. They were acting as if they were 40s to 50s. It was just unbelievable to see them. It really gave us the spirit to do our activities. They sang loudly with us, they danced together with us, they clapped and wave the beat of the music, and they laugh together with us. When we were asking how did they feel, they always answer " We are so Happy ". Suddenly it was that time when I felt extremely satisfy and happy with myself that I already serve other people with Joy and Peace.
Oh Blue Butterfly can't stop sharing story now, but the other butterflies keep listening....
The second population was My Special Butterfly who was celebrating his 23rd B'day. We were having delicious dinner with the other friends ( 10 Butterflies ). Special Butterfly was surprised by the beautiful B'day cake in the beginning, then he shared the cakes with everybody. Everybody was so busy of taking picture smiling here and there. After that, the second surprise for Special Butterfly was the gift from his sister ( Pink Butterfly ) and I. The last surprise was the Hand-made B'day card by Pink Butterfly with all of our signatures and whishes inside. I just feel so delightful to see Special Butterfly felt so happy and was so touched with all of the surprises and to see all of his friends who care and love him so much.
Finally I understand what My God always say " It is better for you to serve than to be served ".
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Birthday wish for my Special Butterfly
Do not know what I should give you as a gift on your birthday, so I just give these words of my heart to you (this can't be bought from any stores in the world hahahah).
I want to say "Thank You" to my Special Butterfly for staying with me as a best friend, as a shelter, as a Special one and as a person who are willing to give forgiveness and sacrifices for his beloved ones. You are not an accidental Special one for me, but you are the answer of my prayer to God. I used to be unable to accept your weaknesses, but now it is your weaknesses that make me become more mature and considerate person. Sometimes your weaknesses even makes me laugh. Is it what they called "Beautiful imperfection" ??? Hopefully all of my imperfections will also be beautiful for
you.
I do not know if we are meant to be together forever as only Him who knows it. But, what I know is that I must always take a good care of what God had given to me and I must cherish everyday of my life with you with lots lots of pray and love. And that is why I want to cherish this special birthday of you with.........
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday E.E.
I wish that God always bless you with his Holy spirit, I wish all the best for your future and I wish all your dreams will come true. At last I wish we can go through our time with lots of love and understanding.
FIGHTING.....FIGHTING....
I want to say "Thank You" to my Special Butterfly for staying with me as a best friend, as a shelter, as a Special one and as a person who are willing to give forgiveness and sacrifices for his beloved ones. You are not an accidental Special one for me, but you are the answer of my prayer to God. I used to be unable to accept your weaknesses, but now it is your weaknesses that make me become more mature and considerate person. Sometimes your weaknesses even makes me laugh. Is it what they called "Beautiful imperfection" ??? Hopefully all of my imperfections will also be beautiful for
you.I do not know if we are meant to be together forever as only Him who knows it. But, what I know is that I must always take a good care of what God had given to me and I must cherish everyday of my life with you with lots lots of pray and love. And that is why I want to cherish this special birthday of you with.........
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Happy Birthday E.E.
I wish that God always bless you with his Holy spirit, I wish all the best for your future and I wish all your dreams will come true. At last I wish we can go through our time with lots of love and understanding.
FIGHTING.....FIGHTING....
Monday, April 13, 2009
The Confusion of Butterfly
2 years ago....
That day was a bad day for the blue butterfly, but it was her own decision that she should face.
Blue butterfly had a good and nice boyfriend who loved and cared for her so much. oh....the name of this male butterfly is E.E. butterfly. They were having a lovely long relationship and were very happy of being together always. But surprisingly that day, Blue Butterfly decided to end their relationship. Blue Butterfly can still captured the expression showed by E.E. butterfly. He was so quiet with no words coming out from his mouth. He was only asking WHY??? WHY??? AND WHY???
Blue Butterfly gave him reasonable answers which actually she herself also did not fully understand. Tears just always coming out from her eyes. At the end, this relationship was really ended.....
What was really happening to Blue Butterfly that day was the confusion of life. She was so confuse about what she wants and needs in her own life. She was confuse about what kind of friends she needs and what kind of life partner that she can hang on for the rest of her life. She was confuse about what she actually likes and dislikes to do for her future. Because of this confusion, Blue Butterfly felt that the good things that God had actually given to her were not good enough. But along this 2 years, she experienced life and kept finding the purpose of her life...
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